For those of who have a hard time forgiving ourselves and would love to remember that we are God’s girl.
On our trip to London and Edinburgh, my husband and I lugged four suitcases, a backpack, a bag and a purse across 5,400 miles, three airports, and two continents over the course of 10 days. Needless to say, it would’ve been easier if we had packed lighter. Although, I stand firm in my belief that packing four pairs of shoes for a week-and-a-half was totally reasonable.
But in my right-now life, I am carrying around far more than four pairs of shoes. In addition to carrying around the weight of failure, I carry the weight of unforgiveness.
Forgiveness isn’t saying that what the person did to me was okay or that I have forgotten the injustice, but it is a cornerstone of the faith Jesus calls us to. And yet, I find it incredibly hard to do, especially when I’m the one who needs it.
Forgiving myself is the hardest part.
I don’t know about you, but I sin…like hourly. I covet your hair, your career, and your mothering skills. I yell at my kids. I get defensive when corrected. The list could go on and on. Sin hurts my heart, and it damages relationships with those I have sinned against and with my Heavenly Father. It doesn’t matter how big or small it is, sin is a big deal.
But Jesus took the weight of all my sin.
He was punished for my iniquities, and He alone can bear the weight. Not Jill. Not you. Jesus. The heaviness I feel isn’t my “just due,” it’s what’s hindering me from experiencing the newness of my creation.
When we don’t forgive ourselves, we walk around heavy and sad, but Jesus wants to give us a life of freedom, of grace upon grace, of delight and joy and hope in Him. Unforgiveness holds us in the past and tells us that we’re defined by the sin, by the shame, and by the hurt. But God has pulled me out of that darkness and into the light.
Please, please quit beating yourself up for past sins. Jesus isn’t doing it, and neither should you.
Achiever, whether you’ve had an abortion, moved in with your boyfriend, yelled at your kid, gotten a DWI, had an affair, or gossiped about your neighbor, you’ve sinned. And those sins, not in part, but the whole, are nailed to the cross and you bear them no more. Jesus put your sins on Himself (1 Peter 2:24) for three reasons:
- So you would be removed from your sin.
- So you could live a genuine, active, rigorous, overflowing, completely complete life for God
- So you would be healed and made whole.
Jesus wants us away from sin and living a crazy-overflowing, healed-and-whole life. Satan wants us broken and hurting and living in shame, regret, and unforgiveness. I don’t know about you, but I prefer to live the way Jesus designed.
Let us accept that we can be both imperfect in our past and forgiven in our today.
So how many pairs of shoes are you lugging around in your right-now life? Achiever, shed the extra weight you’ve been carrying. There is no need to hold on to the unforgiveness that has a death-grip on your heart. Instead, lay the weight at the feet of Jesus and let Him remind you of who you really are: His beloved, His friend, and His girl.